Comment Wall

Link to my portfolio 

https://sites.google.com/view/lagge-portfolio

comment

Week 4: Meat Restaurant

It was a few days after his brother's successful coup, and despite life generally returning back to normal for the rest of the country, all things considered, David was closing his meat restaurant for good. In fact, every restaurant that served meat was closing as well. This was because of "President" Eli's new executive order to ban the eating of meat.

As David packed the rest of his cooking utensils in cardboard boxes he thought back on the good times. The times when him and his brother ran the greatest meat restaurant in the world. With David as the cook and Eli as the face of the restaurant they were unstoppable. People would wait in the rain and snow for hours just to taste their reasonably priced yet delicious food.

And then one day it all changed. One day Eli took a tour of a factory farm at David's request and came back a changed man. No longer did he want to cook meat, but instead he wanted to turn the meat restaurant into a vegan one, but when Eli told him no, David took matters into his own hands. 

At first Eli was reasonable. He decided to open his own vegan restaurant, but when Eli asked his brother for help to cook vegan food, David denounced his brother and refused to help stating that vegan food was not real food. Shortly after Eli's restaurant closed down. In his darkest moment Eli then realized that cooking good vegan food was not the way to get people to stop eating meat, but instead it was through politics. Shortly after his vegan restaurant closing Eli formed the Animals Liberation Party.

The party was a success. Not only was Eli able to make promises, but he was able to fulfill them as well. And before long he was elected president of the country. Eli was actually a good president. Under his guidance the country saw life expectancy skyrocket, technology advance, and a large increase in the quality of life for all citizens.

However, all of this was done with an ulterior motive. The day before Eli was to leave office congress voted to abolish term limits and give Eli absolute power. Suddenly everything was in place. As his first act of President for Life Eli abolished the eating of meat with every country in the world following as well.

As David turned off the lights he wondered if he could have changed things. Maybe if he just taught Eli how to cook vegan this could all have been avoided. However, it is hard to know these things he thought.

David's meat restaurant

Author's Notes: This story is an adaptation of "Rama and the Monkeys" from the Ramayana. In the story Rama meets the monkey king Sugriva who has had his wife and kingdom taken from him by his brother Vali. The story I made is based on that story, because similarly to the story in the Ramayana, the brothers were once friends and then they became enemies.

Bibliography: "Rama and the Monkeys" from the Public Domain Edition of the Ramayana by Geraldine Hodgson. Source

Reading Notes: PDE Ramayana Part D

 Rama had a bridge built to get to Lanka. Although it seems like it would be easier to just build boats instead of a bridge. It also seems like Ravana's pride is the cause of his downfall. This plot point would make for an interesting story. Also for some reason Ravana tried to make Sita think that Rama was dead. I did not really like how Rama is crazy powerful to the point where nothing was really at stake. Throughout the story there is never any question if Rama is going to win, but during the battle it starts to somewhat feel like a battle where both sides suffer and we really see Rama struggling to win. As a result, I want to make my stories have the hero struggle and even lose at times.

Ravana being sad about his sons death is somewhat similar to how Achilles is sad in The Illiad when Patroclus dies. And Ravana decides to go on a rampage as well. I do not really like how Hunaman is able to just keep going to the Himalayas super quickly to revive the warriors who died. It was interesting how Rama tested Sita to make sure she was faithful to him, and although it looked like he was being unreasonable at first I think he knew that she was faithful so she would be able to pass the trial.

I thought it was dumb that Sita was exiled by Rama. Especially because she went into exile with Rama on her own will, it kind of stings that she was forced into exile.

Himalayas

Bibliography: M Dutt, R. Dutt, Gould, Griffith, Hodgson, Mackenzie, Nivedita, Oman, Richardson, and Ryder, Public Domain Edition of The Ramayana, link

Reading Notes: PDE Ramayana Part C

 Sugriva and Rama have many similarities. They both have been exiled and have had their wife stolen from them. Vali was trapped in a cave because of Sugriva despite Sugriva having good intentions. It would be interesting to write a story similar to this one in which there is a misunderstanding that causes a power struggle among former friends. The fight between two brothers like when Vali and Sugriva fought could also be a good story.

It would be interesting to have a story where the hero helps someone and then that person ends up not fulfilling his promise. Hanuman finds Sita who looks sad and sick and she refuses to be Ravana's husband. Sita refused to be saved by Hanuman. It would be interesting to have a story where someone refuses to be saved out of pride and that choice is their downfall.

It does not make a lot of sense why Ravana did not kill Hanuman even though he was an "envoy". Hanuman was clearly not an envoy anymore once he started killing Ravana's guards. And Hanuman then set half of Lanka on fire. Additionally, Ravana's brother decided to ally himself with Rama.

Monkey

Bibliography: M Dutt, R. Dutt, Gould, Griffith, Hodgson, Mackenzie, Nivedita, Oman, Richardson, and Ryder, Public Domain Edition of The Ramayana, link

Feedback Strategies

 The first article I read was Seven characteristics and (Six Tools) That Support Meaningful Feedback. What I liked about this article was that is was similar to the feedback gallery in that it efficiently gave and pointed out tips for giving constructive criticism. The first point that I hadn't thought about when giving feedback is to be constructive. That is, do not just say what is wrong but also suggest solutions for said problem. I also liked the point to not be grade focused. Often times when someone receives criticism they can expect their grade to drop, and as a result they do not try to be as creative. What is nice about not being grade focused is students are not afraid to make mistakes, so they will try new things causing them to learn more. I also liked the point about being specific. Often times when giving constructive criticism someone will be vague. But this is not helpful, because it leads the creator not knowing what to fix often times leading to the problem staying the same.

The next article I read was Giving Creative Feedback - A Guide for Those Who Aren't Creative. What I liked about this article is how the author suggests asking probing questions. I think asking the right questions is the best way for someone to improve in general. This is because it forces the person to really think about what they are doing and to think the process of their decisions. And it is important that these question are probing questions, because if they aren't it just leaves the reader unsure how to proceed or what to think about. I also like the idea of looking for red flags. I think the most important part of creative writing is telling a story that makes sense, because if it leaves the reader confused then it is hard for them to appreciate what you have created the same way you do. And leaving the reader confused doesn't is not the same as leaving the ending up to the interpretation of the reader. It means ensuring that what you want to get across gets across to the reader.

Giving constructive criticism

Topic Research: Downfall of Kings

    I was thinking I would do a portfolio. This way I can have a lot of different stories and I won't be too tied down with having to follow a consistent plot. The theme I was thinking about doing was about leaders who misuse their power and either are redeemed or lose everything.

The first story I was thinking of doing was inspired by Rama's exile in the Ramayana I also want to use more from the Ramayana once I have finished reading it next week. I want to do a story where a leader is exiled/loses everything and has to overcome some trials and save the day.

The second story I was thinking of doing was Vali: The Downfall of  an Arrogant King. In this story I want to have a king who continues to mistreat those that helped him gain power and then be betrayed by the ones that once supported him. However, I'm not sure if the king will win or lose in the end.

The third story I was thinking of doing was inspired by The Crocodile and the Monkey's Heart and my week 2 blog post. I want to have a story where a leader has too much trust, and that trust leads to his eventual downfall.

King in the castle

Week 3: Deadlifting World Champion

 Eli sat in silence waiting for his name to be called. Today was the day he was going to break the deadlifting world record and defeat his rival David once and for all. Suddenly Eli's name was called. It was time for him to go. As he walked out on the stage he thought back three years to when David had broken his deadlifting record and shortly after, David retired. Eli also thought about the last brutal three years of training. Doing two a days six days a week, eating healthy, cardio, and no alcohol. Eli also thought about how he was at the end of his prime and how he did not have much more time if he was wanted to retake his record. This was likely his one last shot.

Eli arrived on stage, and despite all of the pressure, he felt confident. He knew he had done the right things, and he knew he could do it. Eli then stood in front of all 1,105 pounds of weight, he grabbed the bar, and he lifted. The next 15 seconds were a blur, but at the end of it Eli knew he had done it. The crowd erupted in a cheer and everyone was chanting his name. "Eli. Eli Eli." With tears streaming down his face Eli could not do anything but smile.

But suddenly David walked on the stage. "Put on five more pounds, he told the weightlifting official. "I'm about to beat this man's record." Everyone was shocked despite being retired David looked bigger than ever. The weightlifting official obliged, and without hesitation David did not one but two reps of 1,110. Without a belt too. Unbelievable! The crowd couldn't believe it. Not only had David broken Eli's record, but he had crushed it. And it was in this moment Eli realized that David had been toying with him all this time, and that even if he did reclaim the deadlifting world record, David would quickly shatter it.

David warms up to beat Eli

Author's Notes: This story was inspired by Rama Wins Sita from the public domain edition of the Ramayana. In the original story Rama has to show his strength and bend and snap a powerful bow in order to win Sita. I changed the story to a competition between two weightlifting rivals, and added the twist to have the hero of the story succeed only to be undone by his rival.

Bibliography: "Rama Wins Sita" from The Public Domain Edition of The Ramayan by M Dutt, R. Dutt, Gould, Griffith, Hodgson, Mackenzie, Nivedita, Oman, Richardson, and Ryder, 

Reading Notes: PDE Ramayana Part B

 Bharata returned back home and discovered what his mother had done, and he is sad that he no longer has his brother or father. He then vowed to not be king and to bring Rama home so he could be king. Once Bharata found Rama he told him to come home and to become king, but Rama refused because he must obey his late father. This is because Rama believes that what makes a person good is their deeds, and that by ignoring his late father's orders he would be betraying him. I do not agree with Rama's decision though, because once the king died he no longer had power, and Bharata, being the new king, should have the power to right the old king's wrongs. Rama then continues to go deeper into the forest and along the way he meets various sages and battles against the demons. Rama then met a Rakshasi who is Ravana's sister and jokingly suggested she try and seduce his brother. The Rakshasi was angry so she attacked the brothers, but she then ran away. She then went to her brother who said he would take care of Rama and his brother with an army of 14,000 Rakashasa. However, Khara's army was defeated. Ravana then decided to talk with Maricha to decide what he could do, and he was told to leave Rama alone. However, Ravana decided to kidnap Sita. Once kidnapped Ravana tried to get her to become his queen but she stayed strong. Jatayu the vulture then tells Rama what happened and Rama and his brother set out for the ape king.

Jatayu

Bibliography: M Dutt, R. Dutt, Gould, Griffith, Hodgson, Mackenzie, Nivedita, Oman, Richardson, and Ryder, Public Domain Edition of The Ramayana, link

Reading Notes: PDE Ramayana Part A

 Dasharatha had no sons from his wives, so he made sought to make a sacrifice. This can act as the plot device for starting the story he then had four children from his three wives. Ravana is the king of the demons and he is invincible except he can be defeated by apes and humans, so Vishnu became the king's son, Rama so that he can then defeat Ravana. Rama was given celestial weapons after battling demons for the first time, and he was able to summon these weapons by thinking about them. I liked in the chapter Ahalya how it was written as a poem. Vishwamitra acts as Rama's mentor. Rama was able to bend the bow and won Sita from her father. Dasharatha then chose Rama to be king but Kaikeyi was persuaded by Manthara, who hates Rama, to use her favors to stop Rama from being king. Rama then went into exile with Sita and Lakshmana. Dasharatha  then dies a sad death due to his bad karma.

 Bending the bow

Bibliography: M Dutt, R. Dutt, Gould, Griffith, Hodgson, Mackenzie, Nivedita, Oman, Richardson, and Ryder, Public Doman Edition of the Ramayana, link

Feedback Thoughts

In this bog post I am going to be discussing constructive feedback. Constructive feedback is extremely important in anything you do, because it's how you improve. I will now discuss two articles that I recently read about ways to take criticism and how to improve yourself in the things you do.

The first article I read was Seven Ways to Crush Self-Doubt in Creative Work. I thought this article was good, because it had a lot of good tips. I thought this was also a good article, because self-doubt is something that almost everyone has especially when doing creative work. I also found myself relating with the author's own experience. For example, they discussed how they tried to make their work perfect and that's something I often find myself struggling with as well.

The second article I read was How to Tame Your Inner Critic: A Simple Habit to Rewire Your Brain. I liked this article, because it talked about how to deal with making mistakes. Instead of thinking you are a failure when you mess up the author instead introduces the idea of forgiving yourself for your mistakes and continuing on. Additionally, I like how the author talks about how mistakes aren't bad, but they lead to growth.

Beach

Storybook Topic Brainstorm

My first inspiration for a storybook idea is from Vali: The Downfall of  an Arrogant King. I have chosen this as a possible story. I am thinking about possibly writing about a king or a leader who gained power, and was a good ruler/leader, but through a series of events they begin to become bad until their eventual death or redemption as I have not yet decided how I would want this story to end.

The next possible storybook topic I my choose is possibly describing battles. This inspiration came from one of the project suggestions, and I thought it might be a cool one to do, because I would focus on a essentially a single event. What I mean is that instead of focusing on the politics and actions that led to the battle I would just focus solely on the battle similar to the movie Dunkirk. 

I am also thinking about making a story about my first storytelling blogpost. I kind of want to continue the story that I wrote, because I left it at somewhat of a cliff hanger. I could explore what happened after Dave rescued Einstein, and I could explore the events that happened that led Dave to mistrust Einstein. I think it could be a lot of fun, because even though it would be inspired by the epics I read, it would still be primarily  my own creation.

The final storybook topic I may write about is my idea of the retelling Indian history. I was inspired from the Wikipedia article that talked about Indian military history. I think there is a lot of potential in this, because I could retell battles or Indian history from the viewpoints of past kings or even the people living in India. Additionally, this could be a cool topic since India didn't use to be a unified country, so there will be plenty of topics to discuss.

Indian warfare

Week 2 Story: Rescuing Einstein

 It was a calm night when John Serpent was in view of the extraction zone. This was where he was supposed to meet the contact, a defecting scientist from the enemy militant group Gearhead. Normally John would have left this kind of task to someone else, but the defecting agent was someone special. John was to meet the the primary man responsible for the almost complete destruction of his squad nine years ago - Hue Einstein. And although one of the surviving members of the squad Zak Mills had tried to talk him out of allowing Hue back into the squad, stating that Hue couldn't be trusted, John acted against his better judgement and decided to help Hue defect.

As John sat thinking about the past he saw a figure approaching. It was Hue. Suddenly, all the pain from the events nine years ago came flooding back, but John held his composure. Hue was the first to speak, "You look different John ." Not wanting to make small talk John replied "It's time to go." John then put a black bag over Hue's head and searched him for tracking devices in order to make sure Hue still wasn't in contact with Gearhead. 

John then led Hue three miles to where the truck that would take them back to base was waiting. Before entering the truck Hue spoke up "I know you don't trust me John , but I want to clear my name from what happened nine years ago. I want to prove that I didn't betray the squad." John was silent,  but he hoped the scientist's words were truthful. On the trip back to base John thought back on all the good Hue had done as a member of their squad, and somewhat sadly he also knew that even if Hue hadn't been the one to betray them things would never be the same. And another thought still sat at the back of his head. What if Zak was right and Hue couldn't be trusted?

Author's notes: This story is based on "The Crocodile and the Monkey's Heart" in which the crocodile tries to trick the monkey into climbing onto his head so he can bring the monkey's heart to his wife so she can eat it. My take on the story is about two old comrades who are reunited after one of them allegedly betrayed the squad. This story, however, is not so black and white as it is never revealed if Hue did betray the squad, and it ends with John possibly remaking the same mistake.

Bibliography. "The Crocodile and the Monkey's Heart" from Eastern Stories and Legends by Maries L. Shedlock source

Hue Einstein

Reading Notes: Week 2 Anthology

The monkey and crocodile stories

• Told from the point of view of the crocodile and the monkey and then from the point of view of the Buddha
• The plot device driving the story both times is the wife of the crocodile wants to eat the heart of the monkey
• In the first story the monkey is somewhat fooled by the crocodile, because he rides on the crocodile to get to the island with better food. As a result, the monkey has to fool the crocodile to get out of the bad situation he put himself in
• In the second story the monkey has to fool the crocodile to get back to the island he normally stays on
• In both stories the monkey outwits the crocodile and the crocodile gives up

A crocodile waits for a monkey

Week 2 Reading Overview

 I have chosen to read the public domain edition of the Ramayan, because I like the idea of reading a book that was written by different authors. This way I can see how different people write differently and gain inspiration for my own storytelling by reading many different styles.

The first comic book that got my attention is Tales of Arjuna. This is because I like how it has a variety of different stories that do not necessary depend on the events of past stories. This is particularly interesting to me, because I know that each story will be unique. Also I thought the story about sacrificing ghee to Agni was somewhat comical.  The second comic book that got my attention is Parashurama, because it is a story that seems like it has a lot of action and drama. Additionally, it seems like the stakes are high, so I know I will really enjoy it.

The first video I really liked was Curating Krishna in the Garden of Assam. This video interested me, because I love going to museums to see and learn about different cultures. For example, when I go to museums I always try to read about every painting or artifact I see. The second video I liked was Ships of Ancient India, because it tells a concise yet informative history of India's trade relations and how they traded. I especially liked it too, because I am interested in history and learning about what people did in the past.

Sacrifice to Agni